Grief doesn't follow a manual. Anyone who tells you it moves neatly through five stages, in order, on a schedule, hasn't sat with enough grieving people to know better. After more than 35 years working in the NHS as a nurse and midwife — and after losing my own husband within a year of retiring — I can tell you grief is not linear, and it's not something you simply "get over." It's something you learn to carry differently.
If you've found this page, you're probably searching for grief therapy options because something isn't shifting on its own. That's not a failure. It's a sign you're ready to be supported properly. Here's an honest look at what's actually available, and how to choose what might help you.
Why "Just Give It Time" Isn't Always Enough
Time softens grief for many people. But for others, grief gets stuck — showing up as chronic fatigue, anxiety, physical pain with no clear cause, anger that doesn't make sense, or a numbness that never lifts. This is sometimes called complicated or prolonged grief, and it's far more common than people realise, especially after a sudden loss, a difficult relationship with the person who died, or a loss that came after months or years of caregiving.
If grief has settled into your body as well as your heart, talking therapy alone sometimes isn't enough. This is where knowing your options matters.
The Main Grief Therapy Options Available
- Bereavement counselling — Traditional talking therapy, usually with a trained bereavement counsellor. Good for processing the story of the loss, working through practical and emotional adjustment, and having a consistent, compassionate space to be heard.
- Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) — Helpful where grief has triggered anxiety, low mood, or unhelpful thought patterns. CBT works well alongside other approaches but doesn't always reach the somatic, body-held side of grief.
- EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique / tapping) — A gentle, evidence-informed technique that combines acupressure points with spoken statements to calm the nervous system around a specific memory or feeling. I use EFT often with grieving clients because it works quickly on the physical charge of grief — the tight chest, the lump in the throat, the wave that comes out of nowhere.
- Hypnotherapy and RTT® (Rapid Transformational Therapy) — This is where much of my own work sits. Hypnotherapy allows access to the subconscious patterns and beliefs that grief can leave behind — guilt that isn't rational, a fear of moving forward, a sense of being "frozen" at the moment of loss. RTT® combines regression work with hypnotherapy to identify where a belief took root and to transform it, often within a small number of sessions rather than months or years.
- A structured framework, like the GRIEF Method™ — In my own practice I developed the GRIEF Method™ — Ground, Release, Integrate, Expand, Flourish — because I saw so many clients arrive already exhausted from grief that had no shape or direction. Rather than open-ended talking, it gives grief somewhere to go: grounding the nervous system first, safely releasing what's been held, integrating the loss into a life that continues, expanding back into the world, and ultimately flourishing rather than merely surviving.
How to Choose the Right Option for You
Ask yourself:
- Is my grief mostly in my thoughts, or do I feel it in my body too (tension, pain, exhaustion, illness)?
- Am I stuck at a particular moment — the phone call, the last conversation, the funeral — that I keep replaying?
- Do I want a longer, open-ended space to talk, or a structured path with a clear beginning and end?
- Is there guilt, anger, or unfinished business alongside the sadness?
If your grief is largely somatic, sits alongside guilt or unfinished business, or you find yourself "stuck" at a particular moment, hypnotherapy, RTT®, or EFT tend to move things that talking alone hasn't been able to. If you mainly need a steady space to process and adjust, gentle bereavement counselling may be exactly right — and there's no reason these approaches can't work together.
You Don't Have to Carry This Alone
Whatever combination is right for you, please don't let anyone — including yourself — tell you that you should be "over it" by now, or that needing support is a weakness. I've nursed the dying, delivered babies, and buried my own husband. I understand grief from both sides of the bed, and I know that the right support at the right time can be the difference between grief that flattens you and grief that, in time, you can stand alongside.
I offer face-to-face sessions on Mondays at Thurso Citizens Advice Bureau, and Zoom sessions across the whole of the UK, so location is never a barrier to getting support.
If you'd like to talk through which option might suit you best, I'd be glad to help you take that first step.
I offer a free 30-minute initial consultation and the link can be found on my website https://griefrecoverywithgwen.com